The Year of Suck (And How I Got Through It)

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By the author of The Ultimate Guide to Frugal Living and What to Eat When You’re Broke

Colette recently wrote an article about how she’s saying “Good Riddance!” to 2023, and I thought I’d finally write about my own Year of Suck.

I always try to keep a positive attitude when it comes to the ups and downs of life and finances, but this year made it rough. I’m going to try and write this without sounding like a whiner. It’s really hard for me to share my problems. I’ve always been a stiff-upper-lip kind of person. I’ve always powered through. Heck, I’m supposed to be someone you can take advice from, yet here I am, having the Year of Suck.

But I guess it’s important to share and to say, “It can happen to anyone.” And also, to remind you (and me!) that a year that sucks doesn’t mean your life sucks.

So, here goes.

It began, as years do, in January.

Right before I was to leave for Europe, where I had planned to relocate, I tweaked my left ankle. I chalked it up to being no big deal and powered through the last of my packing, selling, and storing with the help of my daughter and one of my besties. I felt like a lazy bum when they made me sit down with my foot up and direct, but grudgingly, for the sake of my trip, I behaved myself.

I got a big immobilizer boot and managed the trip over without too much difficulty but when I arrived at my apartment in Greece, my ankle hurt so much I knew I couldn’t take another step for days. So, I used workarounds and ordered groceries via delivery and had a few restaurant meals delivered as well. My apartment was down one flight of stairs – not fun but manageable.

After being in Greece for a week and not being able to leave the house to explore, I finally booked an appointment with a physical therapist. I was still convinced that my injury was minor and that I just needed to do the right exercises and push through it. My PT guy was fantastic and really did help me become somewhat more mobile.

But something was wrong. I couldn’t walk very far – only a mile or two and only every other day. I’m a person who loves the pedestrian life – walking to the market, visiting little shops on foot, exploring my neighborhood, and going to see tourist attractions. I’m more of a 3-5 mile-a-day walker, and I couldn’t even build up to the bottom of my personal scale.

I figured that I was just out of shape. Sadly, I slashed a few day trips off my list that would’ve required extensive walking and climbing and tried to focus on all that was going right.

I visited two more countries on this trip.

I went to Bulgaria and Romania while I was still in Europe. The days I had to travel really took it out of me and ramped up the pain levels. Bulgaria was nice and flat, at least in Sofia, where I spent most of my time. The downside was that I couldn’t easily order food or grocery delivery there, but I managed to find places close by, and taking a car service was really inexpensive.

Then I did a day trip in Romania that really pushed my limits beyond my ability to handle it. I visited three old castles in one day. They were tall, glorious buildings, each from a different century. I went up and down dozens of flights of stairs that day. The pain in my foot and ankle by the end of the day was indescribable but I kept pushing through it because there really wasn’t an option when I was at the top of Bran Castle. I had to go down this rough stone spiral staircase with tiny little steps that required me to set my feet sideways to fit on them.

When I got back to the vehicle, I was done. I didn’t even get out when we stopped for gas and bathrooms.

I got back to my apartment and learned that my daughter and her partner had just broken up. They’d been together for years, and she was devastated. I knew she needed her mom.

I sent some money to help her get settled into a new apartment. It was time to go back to the US, support my daughter, and get this injury figured out.

I booked a flight.

The trip back was utterly hellish. My nice watch was stolen when I went through security. Each flight was late, causing my layovers to be very short. My layovers were so distant – literally opposite ends of the airport. I had to hobble-run through them to make my flights. The TSA in Chicago was the worst I’ve ever dealt with. I haven’t been treated so rudely in all of my years traveling, and I swear they were just amusing themselves, making me hobble around to different lines for different things.

I love to travel, and I’m generally patient at airports. But it all just felt like too much.

I usually am so sad to return from a long trip, but this time, I could’ve kissed the ground. I was in pain, I was stressed, and I just wanted the convenience of being back in the United States and amidst people who spoke my native language for a change.

Then things got worse.

My daughter had been looking after my beloved Jeep while I was gone. She wasn’t driving it because Esther (the Jeep) had been sputtering and acting funny. I had her take it to the shop right before my return and dropped over $2000 to repair it.

The first time I took it out after returning, things were okay. It felt weird to be back behind the wheel after nearly a year of not driving. But the second time, I didn’t even make it out of the driveway when the Jeep began actively misfiring. I stopped it immediately and had it towed back to the shop.

I got a ride from a friend and went to look at a nice little apartment with utilities paid, not too far from my daughter. I applied for it at first sight. I adored the landlady, a woman about my age with kids about my kids’ ages. It was a beautifully finished above-ground basement, and I immediately signed on the dotted line.

Later that day, the manager called me.

My Jeep needed a new engine.

A.

New.

Engine.

This Jeep wasn’t terribly old but was old enough to be well out of warranty. I still owed some money on it. And the repair was going to be…wait, are you sitting down?

SEVEN THOUSAND DOLLARS.

I said no. There was no way I was throwing more money at this Jeep.

And then I didn’t have a vehicle.

So now, I had no vehicle. I had rented an apartment that was thankfully close to all the basics and walkable.

Oh. Yeah. The apartment was walkable, and I could barely walk.

I had to figure out how to handle all the catastrophes my life was throwing at me.

I got moved in by the grace of Uhaul, my daughter, and a pleasant, very strong guy named Ed who we hired off of an app.

I laid there amidst the boxes on a mattress I ordered from Amazon for the next three days, feeling my foot and ankle throb, unable to muster the motivation to unpack. I got some groceries delivered. I thought, “I’m sure if I rest, it’ll be fine.”

But at this point, it had been nine long months of dealing with this injury. I was not fine. Not at all.

I re-signed up for an insurance policy and had to wait 30 days for it to kick in. I managed to hobble to the store a few times and get unpacked but it came at a price in pain.

And if that wasn’t enough, now I owed the balance of my loan after returning my clunker Jeep to the lender. Thousands of dollars. I still believe returning it was better than spending thousands of dollars to fix it AND thousands of dollars to pay it off. My mistake was having payments to start with. When I got the vehicle, I was certain I absolutely could not survive without one, and I didn’t have the money to pay cash. I counted on the relative newness of the vehicle in that it would be reliable. Clearly, I’m proving right now that it’s not as essential as I thought, even though I’d prefer to have one.

Anyway, now my credit was in the toilet, and getting a new vehicle wasn’t going to happen soon. I’d just funded two moves complete with deposits, so my emergency fund was exhausted.

Heck.

I was exhausted.

But you do what you have to do.

Yeah, I was worn out, but I did what you do in situations like this. I adapted. I adjusted. I pushed through.

I wrote down the amount I had been spending on car payments, maintenance, and insurance. This was my fund to manage without a car and without full mobility. I realized that I could spend a little extra (around 10-20 a week) to get groceries delivered via Instacart. I could order other essentials from Amazon with free Prime shipping. I could Uber to appointments but planned to spend the next couple of months mostly staying home and resting my beleaguered ankle.

It wasn’t ideal, and it was kind of isolating, but I had a strategy I could manage financially. In fact, I was actually better off financially for the time being. I probably never would’ve unloaded my Jeep if the matter hadn’t been forced on me but perhaps, in some way, it was for the best. It wasn’t like I could go wander through the stores even if I could drive there.

The ankle

I finally got to the doctor, a really awesome foot and ankle specialist, who informed me that I had been walking around Europe with a ruptured tendon. I was put on bed rest (or couch rest) with my foot elevated, but since I’d already figured out how to deal with things like groceries and other needs, it wasn’t a huge deal. My daughter came over to help with tasks like laundry and hauling the trash can to the curb on garbage day.

I’ve now undergone three months of treatment on my ankle. There are some things that I have to pay out of pocket for, including a very expensive PRP procedure at the end of January. After I recover from that, I get to start seeing a physical therapist. There’s some light at the end of the Tunnel of Suck once the Year of Suck is over.

The doctor seems confident that a full recovery will be made, though, after an entire year of severe ankle pain, it’s hard to see that happening. But, as I have repeated to myself about a million times this year, “All I can do is all I can do.” I’m following instructions to the letter, and I’ve come up with workarounds for just about everything. And if the procedure doesn’t work out, I have some ideas for how to manage that, too.

There’s some satisfaction in this.

There’s some satisfaction in getting through a Year of Suck. I never expected to be in this place at this point in life. I didn’t expect to be pretty much disabled in my 50s. I never thought that I would be without a vehicle through no choice of my own – I’ve had a car since I was 16 years old. I didn’t imagine I’d be adding some part-time work to my plate to pay for medical treatments.

But I have gotten through it. I got to spend time exploring ancient places in Europe. If it’s my last travel hurrah, I have no regrets. I saw incredible places and learned incredible things. And now, I’ve landed a side gig that starts in January. I have a great relationship with my daughters, my landlady is a wonderful human, and I have a safe, comfortable place to live. I came up with creative solutions to the difficulties. I even adopted a kitty.

My emergency fund, yet again, saved the day. It got my daughter, and me settled into safe, comfortable accommodations and paid for some other unexpected expenses.

As for the money pit of a Jeep, well, credit, schmedit. It’s important to remember that the right thing for you may not be the right thing on paper in the eyes of the rest of the world. I made the best decision I could, given the situation life threw at me.

Have you ever had a Year of Suck?

None of this was to say, “Woe is me. Feel sorry for me.” That’s the last thing I want.

It’s to say, “Excrement happens.”

Will you use it as fertilizer for growth, or will you let yourself be buried in it?

Have you ever had a period of time when one thing after another went wrong? When everything changed through no choice of your own? How did you handle it? Do you have some lessons or wisdom to share from this?

Let’s talk about it in the comments section.

About Daisy

Daisy Luther is a coffee-swigging, adventure-seeking, globe-trotting blogger. She is the founder and publisher of three websites.  1) The Organic Prepper, which is about current events, preparedness, self-reliance, and the pursuit of liberty; 2)  The Frugalite, a website with thrifty tips and solutions to help people get a handle on their personal finances without feeling deprived; and 3) PreppersDailyNews.com, an aggregate site where you can find links to all the most important news for those who wish to be prepared. Her work is widely republished across alternative media and she has appeared in many interviews.

Daisy is the best-selling author of 5 traditionally published books, 12 self-published books, and runs a small digital publishing company with PDF guides, printables, and courses at SelfRelianceand Survival.com You can find her on FacebookPinterest, Gab, MeWe, Parler, Instagram, and Twitter.

Daisy Luther

Daisy Luther

Daisy Luther is an author and blogger. She's the single mom of two daughters and credits extreme frugality and a good sense of humor for her debt-free lifestyle. She is the author of numerous books, the editor of TheOrganicPrepper.com, and is the founder of a small digital publishing company in the emergency preparedness niche.

33 thoughts on “The Year of Suck (And How I Got Through It)”

  1. Ultimate year of suck for me. Spent first months in hospitals being abused and left for dead. Finally got help but living in a hellish chronic medical disaster. Came on suddenly at the end of 22. Does that make 22 the real year of suck even though before that it was a good year? This one is ending and Im dreading the next because things are far from good. Not a good mental place to be in. I went from zero dependence upon this horrific medical system to total dependence for my life. This has also been the most expensive crushing year of my life. God help us.

    1. I’m so sorry, M. That sounds definitely suckish.

      It’s always nice to think the worst is behind us, but sometimes it isn’t. Facing that reality, like it appears you have, can help a lot. Can we help by brainstorming strategies with you? Or just listening to your story?

      I’ve faced suckage in the past that I thought would never end. What got me through it was finding things, no matter how small, to be grateful for. It sounds like you escaped your abusive situation, which is a win and something many people never find the strength to do. I commend you for that. It’s HARD. And though the medical care isn’t what you desired I’m so glad you are here and still fighting.

      ❤️ I really hope that 2024 sucks less. ❤️

      1. Daisy and all – so sorry to hear of everyone’s troubles this past year. It was also a major year of suck for me, too. For someone who has led a healthy life for 80 years with no broken bones ever, this year made up for it! Three ambulance rides netting broken bones each time along with a horribly sprained ankle that I’m still feeling and a discovered bladder cancer. Due to an unnaturally happy attitude & the grace of God, I managed to get through it but feel like the year was mainly wasted due to all the downtime. I pray that 2024 will be a banner year for all and that we can move on to much better & healthier times!

    2. And if you are female, you may need more than god’s help. Can’t speak for other countries but the US healthcare system treats women like dirt.
      As Daisy says, we’re willing to brainstorm or just listen. And do remember, most (though the number is decreasing) hospitals are not for profit. Depending on your state, your AG might be a hard posterior and ensure non-profits follow the rules. If you can’t pay, you can’t pay. Sounds like you’ve been put through the wringer so please, please, advocate the best you can when it comes to payment. Remember if the hospital accepts any federal reimbursement (aka Medicare or Medicaid), the ER/hospital must treat you until you are stable.

  2. When we went to Mexico four years ago when my daughter graduated from high school, I arranged to have a wheelchair at the airports. I have MS, but am not paralyzed and walk at stores etc. but the wheelchairs were wonderful. The airline pays for the wheelchairs, and you tip them. Coming home on Dec 6, 2019, we would have had to run from one end of the Cancun Airport to the other, without knowing where we were going. No problem for the young man pushing me. My daughter ran along behind. Hours at the Mexico City airport. Then Dallas, with a two-hour layover. I thought we’d eat a late lunch there. Thank Heavens for the wheelchair and the attendant. We trundled along very fast to five different lines. I kept asking if I could put away our passports, and he kept saying Not yet, you’ll need them for several more lines. I asked if there were a flu going around, everyone on the planes and at the airports had been coughing. As was I, with Covid, two days later. The attendant took us on a train from one terminal to another, which would have taken more time than we had without the wheelchair. Ultimately, we reached our gate with only ten minutes to spare. No time to eat. My daughter was very upset. I asked if she’d want to eat even though we’d miss our plane. She said Yes! I said Tough. We’ll find something in St. Louis at ten p.m. I highly recommend wheelchairs at airports. I tipped each ten dollars, well worth it.

  3. Thank you for posting this, Daisy, I know a lot of people need to see it right now. Not only the fact that they aren’t alone, but also that no matter what, there are ways around and through problems. My own year hasn’t been so terrible, objectively, but anxiety has been kicking my butt and so has stress. This economy isn’t helping either. A major priority, now and in the new year, is in improving my own flexibility and resilience so I deal with stress better, and hopefully lower some of the anxiety.

    1. Thank you for your kind words! This wasn’t easy to post. 🙂

      I’m sorry to hear about the anxiety. I deal with this issue myself. I’ve found the less time I spend online and the more I spend in the “real world” the better I feel. I’m sure you have plenty of strategies in place that work for you, too!

    1. You’re absolutely right. My mistake was thinking I *had* to have a vehicle and when I didn’t have the money to pay for one outright, I financed it. But if this whole cluster proves anything it’s that a car is not absolutely necessary in all cases. If I had it to do over again, I would certainly not finance.

      Hopefully my lesson will help others not to make the same mistake.

      1. Thank you for sharing your story.
        It can be difficult to re-live pain and to be vulnerable to others, and to have to change one’s view of oneself.

        But sharing the story and lessons learned redeems the suffering, by showing others that while suffering is inevitable, it can draw people together in compassion, and can educate folks about ways of coping.

        Thanks for sharing. You didn’t waste “the suck” but turned it into something of value.

        That’s a great victory.

  4. 2022 was my year of suck but not due to my health or finances. What seemed to be a non-stop end of immediate family, close family and friends dying. Donations to organizations per the wishes of the deceased or donations to the family of the deceased. I’m in a good financial position – living frugal/below my means (no matter what my salary) and just good fortune. I help out where I can, when I can, how I can. And I take nothing for granted. Life can turn on a dime so I take nothing for granted. I try to stay grounded.

    1. I’m so sorry for all your losses. It’s really difficult when the hits just keep on coming. I hope your good memories of those you lost provide some measure of comfort.

      Also, it’s wonderful that you see that though you have good fortune now, things can change. Not everyone seems to realize it and it can give them a false sense of superiority.

      Happy New Year!

  5. I suppose 2023 was a year of suck for me – I was diagnosed with stage 4b metastic lung cancer in March. But…I have a wonderful oncologist and after my last PET scan he said, “I think we’re looking at a miracle!” The chemotherapy and immunotherapy are working!! Praise God!
    Then in November I was taken by ambulance to the ER – blood glucose of 800!! The immunotherapy has attacked my pancreas and I’m now a Type 1 diabetic. But…I got an insulin pump two days ago – no more 4 shots a day!! I’ll get through this too.
    I’m truly grateful for the blessings in my treatments and for my husband!
    Bring on 2024!! 🙂

  6. It’s been a difficult 2 yrs dealing w a spouse who walked out on me yet promising he’d return once he got his issues sorted out. One of which is binge drinking, the verbal abuse I’ve endured is beyond anyone’s limits. I kept hoping he’d change but the outcome looks bleak. I’ve now accepted that it’s over and hoping for a better year in 2024!

    1. Oh, Jillian – that must be so hard. I strongly urge you to look at this as a beginning, not an ending. I now it’s very hard but as a divorced person, when I finally decided it was done, I painted my entire house pink, including furniture. I made it this ridiculously girlie little haven and it made me really happy. I also got a cat. Think about the things you wanted to do but couldn’t when you were together without getting flack for it. Then DO THEM.

      Big hugs – hang in there!

  7. I’m sorry about your “year of suck” but I was glad to read your story and how you got through. This year, my stepdad died and my best friend killed himself, and I’m dealing with a major family estrangement. I’m praying and taking it day by day. And, I was just hit w/some major bills. I’m coping and waking up each day just grateful to be alive. If I’m alive, there is hope and something that I can do to make my situation better. I’ve had to take a hard look at myself and it wasn’t pretty. Thank God for my preps and my emergency fund. That’s mostly due to you and the articles and books you’ve published, so thank you. You’ve made a difference in my life.

    1. Oh no, Denise. Those two deaths alone are absolutely horrible. Add the estrangement and bills and you, too are dealing with a Year of Suck.I love your hopeful attitude. Self-examination is the key and that was a very important step. Things can only go up from here!

      I’m really, really glad I’ve helped you over the years.

  8. Our years that really sucked were 2008-2009. In 2007, we seemed to be doing really well. We both had jobs that seemed recession proof, we had 5O% equity in our home, and we had just bought a new car. We were paying ahead on our bills even. Then it all came to a screeching halt. In January 2008 I lost my job and shortly after so did my husband. We lost our car, our car, a neighbor’s kid wrecked our truck, we lost our house. My husband was not able to make child support payments for his daughter so he ended up in jail. Our pastor gave us the money to get him out of jail. He gave us an old car that he had. My brother let us move into his house. We got food and energy assistance.

    Now, we have a house and two vehicles that are completely paid for. We grow a lot of our own food. We have low energy bills and I have developed good credit that I use sparingly. Our children have all grown up and are doing well for themselves. We have learned that some years do suck, but there is light at the end of the tunnel if we keep focused on what we want for our future.

    1. Wow, Cygnet. You really turned things around. I’m so impressed with how you got through it all, and also with how well you’re doing now. Thank you for sharing your story. It’s very inspiring!

  9. 2022 was truly my year of suck when I lost my DH. 2023 was a year of limbo, trying to decide which road to choose. I made my decision to move closer to my grandchildren. I lined up and started a new job, but have not been able to find a home. I have been staying with my kids, but I hate feeling that I am being a burden (they assure me I am not). So I am going into 2024 with a positive attitude, looking forward to my own new home (having never lived alone in my own place, I have lots of great frugal plans!),sleepovers with the grands, a new pet…I am grateful for family and friends who encouraged me to wait a year before making any major decisions. But it is definitely time to move on with my life. DH would encourage that, and be glad I am able to be closer to tge kids and grands. (They were always our bugout plan anyhow) Everyone’s suck is different, but by sharing it and how you/we overcame, hopefully we can help others through their own personal suck. Here is to 2024 being a better, no, great year for all of us!

    1. Wow, what a ride! 2022 must have been so incredibly difficult. I’m sorry for your loss.

      It sounds like you’ve made some great decisions and have found happiness again. I’m so glad you shared this because it’s so filled with hope and it shows that things DO get better.

    2. I have not been through this yet, but I thought about this just recently that if my husband dies first (and statistically men do), it is going to be hard to adjust to being alone after so many years. I don’t have any living children and most of my relatives are older, so I will be by myself. My older neighbor of 85 told me she felt like she turned invisible once she aged.

      I do try to read the Bible daily (as I am Christian) and have a daily prayer time. This has helped in other “suckable” years of my life. Paradoxically, praying for the needs of other people helps me a lot. I remember once reading a prayer list from church in which a young man with a terminal illness asked us to pray that he would live long enough to walk across the stage for his high school graduation.
      Well, that stopped any self-pity for me right there.
      I occasionally think of that young man. He is long gone, but I have never forgotten his prayer request.

  10. Holy Cow! After reading everyone’s stories, I have been blessed so far indeed. I got a new (to me) car; in California you MUST have a car. Or a great bicycle. I hear folks from the Midwest talk about driving 30/50 miles to the grocery store, and I think, so? I am in a populated city but my grocery choices are 30-40 miles round trip to the closest. But the stress of payments is a killer. So my big goal this is year is to once AGAIN get all of my bills paid off. So far, I have had to buy a new computer-the old one was circa 2012. I got it at zero interest for a year, so yeah, making those payments.
    Daisy: I am so sorry about your ankle. We all take good health for granted, until…..Have you thought about a bike once you heal? I love Nihola’s-they are made in Denmark, and you can carry dogs, groceries, kids, etc. on them. Pricey but you only pay once. The Danish use bikes like we use cars, and you can see them on Youtube. I love Jeeps; they are sexy and fun and like a temptress-demanding and expensive to maintain. I bought a Nissan Rogue. I went from 2006 technology to 2021 technology, and I can tell you cars have way too much stuff on them now. Is it fun to drive? Absolutely! But I did just fine without all of the bells and whistles of reminders of how close another car is or having the phone ring me on the car.
    This site has taught me so much about frugal living, preparing for the future, and still living a good life. I am ever grateful that you are you Daisy!

  11. What a wild painful year you’ve had.
    My last few years have all been hard but survivable. But this month has about overwhelmed me. My second son lives in another nation 13 hours ahead of us. He contracted a tropical infection and died unexpectedly on December 22nd. His two disabled vet brothers and I have paid for the funeral and cemetery plot. Now we are trying to figure out how to raise a minimum of $700 a month for the next few months for his widow and 6-year-old daughter to live until the Social Security Disability income can be changed over to them. Her family is destitute and her mother is in too poor health to even watch her 6-year-old granddaughter. At just about 77 I know I’ll survive but I haven’t even been able to renew the license on my 20 year old truck. Thankfully a friend will take me anywhere I need to go. But just keeping going feels overwhelming right now.

    1. Right now my daughter-in-law is leaving for the main city in the country to report the death of an American citizen and make the necessary changes to their paperwork. By ferry and bus, it is a minimum 6-hour trip. She can stay with her sister in the city and will go to the embassy on January 3rd. Every page of paperwork is heavily charged to make the papers and file them. Nothing is cheap or easy. She’s been working to come here legally. They paid hundreds of dollars to lose it all when travel was banned because of COVID-19. She had already passed the background check etc. Now they are doing everything over again. It is crazy but she has a better chance now as a widow of a citizen. She will file that request also on this trip.

  12. Hi All,
    It has been sad to hear of everyone’s tragedies yet hopeful to listen to peoples victories. Everyone is living through their own set of challenges and with the right amount of creativity, blind faith and gumption some to most of us will do ok.
    I’m older and after being single for over a decade I was thrilled to met an amiable person and have been in a serious partnership for nearing two years. I care deeply for my partner but she has been struggling terribly with a mental health crisis and it is wearing me thin. Because of this she sometimes blames me for the hardship she is facing and at times she breaks up with me. When her condition improves she is super apologetic and wants to be close. I’ve offered ideas,read all about her illness and try to summarize it for her but she refuses treatment . The roller coaster ride has been painful. I’m caught in a bind and want to be there but am tired of the drama. I have abandoned my own preparation plans for these two years. I know it’s something I need to work on about codependency but only certain people can make you feel like this person makes me feel when she is doing well. I feel that this challenge has put me through my own personal test so it’s been a harsh two years. Im not sure where to go with it because this relationship could end at any given moment. I welcome responses to this post. Thank you.

    1. I know the feeling all too well, they make you feel over the moon when they’re in a good mood then not so much when things go wrong. He’d turn into jekyll & Hyde under the influence, a really nice guy otherwise. It’s complicated for sure, sometimes it’s best to let go to preserve one’s sanity!

    2. No one can tell you want to do, exactly, so my advice may not be all that helpful. I heard once that if you are in a bad relationship, you have to ask yourself, “Am I better off WITH this person or WITHOUT this person?” You do not have children and both sound like you are mature adults. You are not responsible for her, and it sounds like you realize you cannot make her happy. It sounds like you are in a relationship that is not going to change.

      You did ask for responses to your post, so here is mine. When I read your post, it seems to me like you already know your answer. It sounds like you are caught in a relationship with a person who is unwilling (or unable) to change and that you are gradually becoming less willing to stay given the current yo-yo cycle. I think you are working on facing up to this reality and gathering the courage to make a change. That’s what I am reading, but it’s your choice. I could be wrong.
      Good luck and best wishes in 2024!

  13. Hi, Daisy!
    I am sorry that you had a tough year. Chronic pain is not a joke. I am glad that you recovered fully from this hardship. I hope you have a great 2024! I am a long-time reader of your blogs and I admire you for how you turn your life’s hard spots into lessons and wonderful pieces of writing.
    I won’t hide from you that I was super exited when I read that you were in Bulgaria. This is my home country and where I live. I hope you enjoyed your stay. I have been to the States just once for 10 days on a business trip and I can say that our worlds are different.
    It was not a bad year for me, thank God.
    I enjoy your blog very much; I hope I will be able to buy more of your books next year.
    All the best and greetings from Bulgaria

  14. I’ve just gone through my third total period of suck in my lifetime (I’m 67), but got through it as I did the first two. During this last one, on top of one major thing after another, my beloved 2005 Mazda 3s also needed a new engine when it blew a piston rod. No one could even find a new or re-conditioned engine for my model, so I ended up having to buy a new car. I’m posting this because you definitely made a bad choice in choosing to ever buy a Jeep. My last car lasted 18 1/2 problem free years before its sudden death, and the previous car (an ’86 Jetta GLI) lasted 20 years and three months, with problems only rearing their ugly head in the last two years. This is because I used the April issue of Consumer Reports, which is the car issue, and refused to buy anything but a car with the top reliability rating. Jeeps consistently get the worst ratings of pretty much all cars. I get the April issue EVERY YEAR, just in case, and I save them. That way you can get the ratings on older cars too.

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